2:34 p.m. - I hope to God they are holding the tip in San Antonio. I will not miss a play dammit! Also, I called the big Arenas fourth quarter. I also predicted a Kings championship. Therefore, the Kings will win a championship. Name that logical fallacy.

2:36 p.m. - Hey Cavs: Stop fouling the Wizards. Some of us would like to see the Spurs-Kings game.

2:37 p.m. - Hey Wizards: Stop fouling the Cavs. Some of us would like to see the Spurs-Kings game.

2:41 p.m. - OK, while ESPN milks every advertisting cent it can get, let's reset the official Game 1 nourishment schedule for Sactown Royalty. We're starting out with a leftover solid chocolate bunny from Easter, paired with a Pepsi over ice. Jalapeno-flavored Pringles and hot wing/blue cheese flavored Cheezit Twisters are in the queue. Also, barbecue is on the postgame menu. We don't f*ck around on gameday.

2:42 p.m. - Apparently, there's a quiz in the left sidebar. Feel free to take it. As many times as you want.

2:43 p.m. - Triple double? Was this mentioned in the last quarter? Holy crap. Nice debut, King.

2:45 p.m. - Lisa Salters isn't bad at her job. A lot less creepy than Jim Grey and twice as competent. We visit San Antonio, with the game already in progres... Spurs 10, Kings 5. Erm.

2:47 p.m. - Note to Kings: Stop letting Tony Parker in the lane. Note to Kenny Thomas: Good job.

2:49 p.m. - I despise you, Bruce Bowen. I despise you.

2:51 p.m. - Thanks to clutch, I now know Grant and Jerry are calling it on News10. I'm quite torn. Choices, choices...

2:53 p.m. - Kozimor is the tiebreaker. Sorry, Musberger.

2:54 p.m. - EVIL ALERT! Horry has checked in...

2:56 p.m. - I'm nervous about the Brad finger thing. Also, about Tony Parker. Also, Michael Finley. 26-17.

2:57 p.m. - From clutch in the comments: "if i switch back and forth really fast its like i can see into the future..."

2:58 p.m. - The formatting is causing me issues, so I'm going to start commenting in the comments.