No Sixth-Graders Allowed

by Ziller on May 25, 2006 3:58 PM PDT in News

According to this fabulous tool, it has been revealed one needs to have a 7th grade education to read Sactown Royalty!

The program checks content on a given website and uses number of words per sentence, syllables per word, and number of high-syllable words to quantify the readability of said website. Using the "Gunning-Fog Index," the data can be put on a scale to describe at what reading level, expressed in school grades, a reader would have to be at to understand the content.

Sactown Royalty checks in (as of right before this post) at 7.63 - which means someone 60 percent the way through eighth grade would be OK reading the site. Yay middle school kids!

Using lowpost.net's list of 30 top basketball blogs, I also gauged the readability of basketblogdom. Anyone could've guessed that Free Darko would have the highest threshold, and they do - FD's Gunning-Fog score is 10.28. (Hell, I'm a college graduate and I don't understand some of what Shoals and the Recluse write.)

The lowest Gunning-Fog score was surprising, though. (And note that low Gunning-Fog scores aren't a bad thing - the tool's programmer makes sure to note that conciseness and clearness is valued. Though, as can be attested by the wholesale scorn of cavepeople and monkeys in our society, simpletondom is not highly looked upon.) Anyways, our Canadian friends at The Basketball Jones earned the lowest score at a remarkable 5.39. Yes, sixth-graders are allowed at TBJ. (And yes, these guys also produce a podcast that is easily 10 times better than any show that's ever appeared on KHTK.)

Here's the full thing. (Wait, that's four straight monosyllablic words in a row. That won't do! Must raise score... oh crap! Too many short words! Must use "antidisestablishmentarianism" in a sentence! Wait, I just did! Woohoo!)

Blog Name-->Gunning-Fog Score

The Basketball Jones-->5.39

Golden State of Mind-->6.3 (If Canada is TBJ's excuse, is Oakland GSoM's?)

Need4Sheed-->6.44

Celtics Blog-->6.45

Cavs World-->6.72

Blog-a-Bull-->6.76

Blog Maverick-->6.88 (This is Mark Cuban's blog. Figures.)

End of the Bench-->6.9

YAYsports!/nba-->7.02

The Mighty MJD-->7.25

lowpost.net/blog-->7.36

Give Me the Rock-->7.38

5-Point Bucks-->7.42

The City-->7.46

The Association-->7.51

Deadspin-->7.56

Clipper Blog-->7.62

Sactown Royalty-->7.63 (Landing just ahead of Will Leitch and Kevin Arnovitz on a "using big words" scale is somewhat of a career accomplishment.)

Hoops Addict-->7.86 (Canadian blood won't hold Ryan's crew down!)

True Hoop-->7.92 (Alright, Henry: More Jasikevicius, less Nenad.)

Detroit Bad Boys-->8.05

Basketbawful-->8.05

Blazers Edge-->8.15 (Prepping for the Bassy and ZBo interviews paid off for Mr. Uppercut.)

Miami Heat-->8.23 (This is written by a real-life newspaper.)

Forum Blue and Gold-->8.58 (High marks for the rare brilliant Lakers fan.)

Bucks Diary-->8.64

Gilbert's Arena-->9.27 (This, paired with FD's top spot on the unaccessibility of language ladder, proves Gilbert's unending quest for knowledge.)

Ben Maller-->9.7 (Paid by the letter, Mr. Maller?)

Free Darko-->10.28 (The kings of confusing-ass text.)

Of course, none of this means anything. Sometime this weekend, I'll compare a few Marty McNeil and Mark Kreidler columns just for fun.

0 recs | Comment 16 comments

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Put me in the game, Coach!

Hey TZ, I've only been posting here for a couple of days, but I've already used words like "bandied" "demeanor" "motivational" and "Ron Jeremy". Maybe I can help get us past them vile and pernicious Detroit Bad Boys!

"When the Going Gets Weird, the Weird Turn Pro." (Hunter S Thompson)

by Mucho Moss on May 25, 2006 7:37 PM PDT 0 recs

Well, I hate to say it...

but shouldn't those supercillous faker fans at Blue 'n' gold deserve a higher rating for actually being that most rare of creatures:

Faker fans masquerading as members of the intelligentsia?

Though why they call themselves blue 'n' gold is beyond me. Last time I checked, those were the UCLA school colors I just 'cuz I love coach Wooden doesn't mean I adore mambo(unless, of course, I'm cooking Steak 'n' eggs).

by Rhondda Nunes on May 25, 2006 10:36 PM PDT 0 recs

Kurt explains it at the site..

I guess Chick Hearn used to say the colors were "Forum Blue and Gold." You know, instead of purple. It was just "forum" blue.

by Ziller on May 26, 2006 7:44 AM PDT up 0 recs

O qU~e?Como disse?NA`o compreendo?

Perhaps if I was caught between Syclla and Charibdes I'd appreciate the dichotomy more.

Interesting the assertion that "forum blue" is around circa 1972, which would coincide with UCLA's championship heyday under Coach John Wooden.The statement that this "just happens to refer to the Lakers" is specious at best, I'd certainly like to hear coach Wooden's thoughts on the "Lakers are the true possessor of the coracao~ of the Blue 'n' Gold) hypothesis...

Also interesting the subtle mention of the Minnietonka opus dei`; the Lakers like to drape their history with those subtle refernces to George Mikan's legacy while they conveniently forget that the Royals won the national championship in 1951; we've all seen the message board rants about the Kings never having won a championship.

Not only have the won one, they took that title away from George Mikan's Minnietonka Lakers that year, 1951.

by Rhondda Nunes on May 29, 2006 5:14 PM PDT up 0 recs

I topped out in Eighth grade

that must explain the ranking. I did teach and tutor 10th grade English for a while, but I guess I was underqualified. I did get those No Child Left Behind test scores up though. Teaching to the test.

by LanceUppercut on May 26, 2006 8:36 AM PDT 0 recs

What's gratifying

Is that our drunken spew over at 120 Proof Ball is more sophisticated than Need4Sheed. And by gratifying, we mean, totally not surprising.

by Todd Lerner on May 26, 2006 12:23 PM PDT 0 recs

Topping them all

Good stuff. It looks like 20 Second Timeout boasts an even higher score: 10.37.

by jgurney on May 26, 2006 2:51 PM PDT 0 recs

the picture on his blog profile

is fake right? I mean, no one this side of Spokane rocks a mustache like that.

by LanceUppercut on May 26, 2006 2:54 PM PDT up 0 recs

Our excuse

We're just too hyphy!

Seriously all of us have college degrees. 6th grade?

Golden State of Mind

by Atma Brother ONE on May 30, 2006 10:01 AM PDT 0 recs

College degrees, yes...

Mine was from Sacramento State, though, so it counts for less. I think St. Mary's vs. CSUEB vs. USF matters in this particular argument.

by Ziller on May 30, 2006 2:17 PM PDT up 0 recs

My blog...

...whooped freedarko's candy asses! Got myself an 11.04 on the Gunning-Fog Index. Guess I should maybe update more than once every three or four months.

And if that's not proof enough that tool is broken, the dufii (that's "dufus" in plural) over at Pounding the Rock pulled a 7.91, and they are hardly more than talking monkies (sorry TZ, I know you like those guys).

by otis29 on May 30, 2006 5:19 PM PDT 0 recs