I've been saying things along this line for years now. Ask your favorite urbanite, and mostly likely they will tell you the same thing. There's a reason city-dwellers don't go out to the wilderness.

I still haven't stopped laughing.

From the grill of the Hibachi...

"There are these things called shark attacks, but there is no such thing as a shark attack. I have never seen a real shark attack. I know you're making a weird face as you're reading this. OK people, a shark attack is not what we see on TV and what people portray it as.

We're humans. We live on land.

Sharks live in water.

So if you're swimming in the water and a shark bites you, that's called trespassing. That is called trespassing. That is not a shark attack. A shark attack is if you're chilling at home, sitting on your couch, and a shark comes in and bites you; now that's a shark attack. Now, if you're chilling in the water, that is called invasion of space. So I have never heard of a shark attack.

When I see on the news where it's like, "There have been 10 shark attacks," I'm like, "Hey, for real?! They're just running around? Sharks are walking now, huh! We live on the land, we don't live underwater."

Hahahahahaha!