Soon, The Last Remaining Threads Holding Isiah Thomas' Brain Together Will Snap

by Ziller on Jan 2, 2008 9:46 AM PST in Free Agency/Trades Comment 19 comments

"Ron Artest is the greatest NBA player I've ever seen!"

"Ron Artest makes a terrific quiche!"

"When Francisco Garcia got a floor burn against Phoenix, Ron Artest walked over and touched Garcia's bleeding knee. The wound immediately healed, and Garcia used his new-found powers from the fingers of Ron to score 30 points."

Do it, Isiah. Do it.

Your ringing endorsements of Ron-Ron in the comments.

0 recs | Comment 19 comments

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Artest

Ron Artest...Rapper...Dog lover...Fighter...
Ron Artest, where amazing happens! Do it Isiah!

by kingme on Jan 2, 2008 10:11 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Good Will Officer

Ron Artest takes a more hands on approach with the fans than any player not named Stepen Jackson.

SACTOWN ROYALTY - Try our thick creamy shakes!

by section214 on Jan 2, 2008 10:38 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Ron Ron

-Ron Artest is my Homeboy.
-The chief export of Ron Artest is Pain.
-Ron Artest has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.
-The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Ron Artest 3. Cancer
-When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Ron Artest.
-Ron Artest doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
-There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Ron Artest has allowed to live.
-Ron Artest does not sleep. He waits.
-Ron Artest is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
-Ron Artest is the reason why Waldo is hiding
-When Ron Artest does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
-Ron Artest is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
-Ron Artest' hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
-Ron Artest doesn't wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
-Ron Artest can slam a revolving door.
-Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Rontatorship.

by kingsfaninjapan on Jan 2, 2008 11:03 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

I take it

You just substituted Ron Artests' name with Chuck Norris'???

by Hoops916 on Jan 2, 2008 11:13 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

basically...

Ron Artest=Chuck Norris

by kingsfaninjapan on Jan 2, 2008 11:19 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

It's True!

The letters in "Ron Artest" can be re-arranged to spell "NBA Championship." It's true. If you cannot do it call Ron Artest and he will do it for you.

SACTOWN ROYALTY - Try our thick creamy shakes!

by section214 on Jan 2, 2008 11:24 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

In Ron's eyes

In Ron's eyes
The light, the heat
In Ron's eyes
I am complete
In Ron's eyes
I see the doorway to a thousand churches
In Ron's eyes
The resolution of all the fruitless searches
In Ron's eyes
I see the light and the heat
In Ron's eyes
Oh, I want to be that complete
I want to touch the light,
The heat I see in Ron's eyes

In Geoff we trust...

by Exhibit G on Jan 2, 2008 11:55 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Every Time

Whenever I see Ron play in person I always get laid that same month.

SACTOWN ROYALTY - Try our thick creamy shakes!

by section214 on Jan 2, 2008 12:01 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Haven't heard the surgeon's name operating on Ron?

That's because he's cutting open his own elbow and removing the bone spurs HIMSELF.

"Yankees Giants Giants Yankees Giants Giants Giants. Yankees."

by Grant Napears Taint on Jan 2, 2008 12:36 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

I thought

Grant's taint was going to squeeze them back into place?

PS~ "The real G. N. is such a douche at the bar he orders vinegar and water...

...such a bitch he grew six nipples and (L.) Ron's wife still won't feed him.

The wise man tells you Where you have fallen And where you yet may fall - Invaluable secrets! The world may hate him. But good men love him.

by Psychrates on Jan 2, 2008 3:20 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

STOP THIS IMMEDIATELY.

Posting and Toasting: Unabashed Knicks fanaticism with the occasional poop joke.

by seth on Jan 2, 2008 1:10 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

C'mon

You can't deny you want to go get tattoo of Ron-Ron's face on your ass! If Isiah trades Lee for Ron, all your wildest dreams can come true!

by Ziller on Jan 2, 2008 2:02 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

I'd rather have David Lee's face tattoed on my ass

If only because you wouldn't have to color it in.

Posting and Toasting: Unabashed Knicks fanaticism with the occasional poop joke.

by seth on Jan 2, 2008 2:50 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

ron ron

I hear the ladies love Ron so much that they forget who their lawyer is and why they needed him as soon as he enters the room.

by Muff209 on Jan 2, 2008 2:37 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

(L.)Ron and the triple-double...

20 p.p.g.
10 Championship predictions
10 assault cases

Did I mention Ron's my fav. player on the team, yet he looks as if he's going to eat you every night? THAT'S the kinda player I love.

The wise man tells you Where you have fallen And where you yet may fall - Invaluable secrets! The world may hate him. But good men love him.

by Psychrates on Jan 2, 2008 3:02 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

If the Knicks want Artest,

They can get one of their own by checking under a bridge or asking the billy goats Gruff.

The wise man tells you Where you have fallen And where you yet may fall - Invaluable secrets! The world may hate him. But good men love him.

by Psychrates on Jan 2, 2008 3:06 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

He's a leader

If you thought the leadership battle between Artest and Bibby was entertaining, you'll love Artest vs. Starbury!

by Kfan in Korea on Jan 2, 2008 4:53 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Ron Artest would have fed his dogs,

they just don't like fish and bread.

Ron Artest is without sin. That is why he cast the first stone... on his wife.

Ron always leaves for Caesar what belongs to Caesar. That's why he loves the Kings: he gets to stay at the Palms, and his disgust of the "Palace".

(those first two are really evil. I actually like Ron, and thinks he gets unfairly obliterated in the media)

by iashwash on Jan 2, 2008 7:09 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Ron Artest is not a great rapper...

But he has more musical talent than all of the Knicks combined, even if they're assisted by Spike Lee....

After he gets up in the morning...he calls Spike Lee to tell him about what he needs to do to improve his directing....Just to be helpfull.

& just in time for lunch; he burns extra calories by bench pressing nate Robenson, Zeke & Starbury all at the same time. He is the 9th wonder of the world but no-one knows this because he's a modest guy & hates to brag.

http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/rhondda

by Rhondda Nunes on Jan 2, 2008 7:57 PM PST reply actions 0 recs