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Around SBN: Jon Jones Arrested on Suspicion of DUI

Hey folks, Peaches here for...Las Vegas WHO?

Hey! Hey ding dong! Listen up! Peaches here to tell you about the Diamond and Gol..wait a minute, this isn't the right one. Who's the jackass who switched my scripts? That's not funny you idiots. Goodbye!
Why is this jackass still here? Lamb? Lamb? Why is this jackass still coming through on my headphones? I thought we hung up on him. Hey, hey, calm down there I'm trying to do a live commercial read. What do you mean you're the producer? Where's Jodi Bacon? Give me Jodi Bacon. Put Jodi on.
What do you mean Jodi's not there? Alright fine, what about Deuce? Where's Deuce Mason? Not there either? Fine, I'll try and wing it. (Clears throat)
When I got my garage redone there was only one place I even considered and that's Asher Garage. Hi, Peaches Napea....wait, does that say Peaches? Alright, who's the wise guy? Nobody's supposed to know about that. Only close persona...can we get somebody to hang up on this idiot? My button isn't working. Someone shut this jackass up.
What? Play nice or I won't get paid? Hey buddy, if you want me to promote your product you gotta tell me what it is because I don't have the script in front of me. The what!? Las Vegas Kings? Who put this idiot on. Let me tell you someth...can I finish? Can I finish? Let me finish. The Kings will NEVER, let me repeat that again NE-VER move to Las Vegas. Not after the...WILL YOU PLEASE LET ME FINISH!? I gave you your time sir. Yes, I know I tried to hang up on you, but there seems to be a probl...will somebody PLEASE get Jodi in here?
Fine, you know what look, just send someone down here with the script and I'll read it. I'm done listening to you. What's your name again? Duke? Send someone down here with the script "Duke". (Throws off headset) Good-bye.
(6-year-old child with a Pats jersey on walks in with script. Peaches snatches the script out of his hands then promptly kicks the child in the balls.)
Will somebody get this kid out of here? Why the hell is he here? Stop it! Stop crying you little baby! You sound just like a Raider fan. Goodbye. Why the hell is this kid still here? I hung up on him! We need to get an engineer here to fix this button. What? You want a tip or something? Get outta here. (Kicks kid who slides across floor and out the door)
Alright, let's do this. I got a flight to Arizona to catch. In case you haven't heard my Giants are in the Super Bowl.
(Clears throat)
Hey, Peach...do I really gotta say Peaches? I hate it when people call me that. Hello? You there? I think we lost him. Hey, where did my headphones go? Who's the asshole that keeps messing with me? Fine, you know what? Let's just do this.
Hey, Peaches here to tell you about the new, hip, crazy cool blog out there called Las Vegas Kings. As their personal bitch, I defended the Maloofs time and time again during that arena measure a while back. The Maloofs know what they are doing, even if it's forcing Geoff Petrie to hire Eric Musselman. Don't worry, just wait and see and that decision will make sense once the Maloofs reveal their flawless master plan for the team. But I'm not here to talk about the Maloofs, I'm here to talk about a blog named after the city that they made famous, Las Vegas Kings. All you gotta do is go to vegaskings.blogspot.com. That's vegaskings.blogspot.com. Go there for insightful columns, links to interesting news stories, and more! And coming soon, podcasts and YouTube videos. So come to VegasKings.blogspot.com, post a comment and tell them Peaches sent you. I know I will.

Star-divide

Extended copy? TZ, you so loco.

(This is a FanPost from a member of the Sactown Royalty community. The views expressed come from the member, and not Sactown Royalty staff.)

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Wow
That is great stuff Murf. Thanks for the read. Very amusing indeed sir.
I am the stone that the builder refused I am the visual, the inspiration That made Lady Sing the Blues..I'm the spark that makes your idea bright...

by pookeyguru on Jan 30, 2008 9:34 PM PST reply actions  

Dear Muff
You're an idiot!!!

Signed - Peaches

PS - That doesn't mean that you still can't open up a free checking account at SAFE Credit Union. SAFE Credit Union. If it's good enough for me, it's probably too good for you.

SACTOWN ROYALTY - Try our thick creamy shakes!

by section214 on Jan 30, 2008 9:37 PM PST reply actions  

You're on a roll tonight section even for you
I am the stone that the builder refused I am the visual, the inspiration That made Lady Sing the Blues..I'm the spark that makes your idea bright...

by pookeyguru on Jan 30, 2008 9:41 PM PST up reply actions  

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