NBA Owners Ranked By Street Cred, in Reverse Order

by Ziller on Apr 30, 2008 6:00 AM PDT Comment 18 comments

30. Herb Simon, Pacers | At least Herb's the cool Simon brother.

29. Chris Cohan, Warriors | Gatsby without skeletons.

28. Leslie Alexander, Rockets

27. Mark Cuban, Mavericks | Collapsed faster than Rome.

26. Dan Gilbert, Cavaliers | Got Usher to purchase stake, but can't keep up with Ratner.

25. Abe Pollin, Wizards | Lost his edge when Stern punked him into giving up "Bullets" moniker.

24. Wyc Grousbeck, Celtics | Bankrolled Mitt Romney campaign, persona non grata in McCain HQ.

23. Rick DeVos, Magic | Member of non-freaky cult.

22. Jerry Reinsdorf, Bulls

21. Ed Snider, 76ers

20. Larry Miller, Jazz | Has a killer stand-up routine.

19. Peter Holt, Spurs | Member of freaky cult.

18. Robert Sarver, Suns | Owns alien research lab in desert, minority stake in Ted Williams's frozen carcass.

17. Bill Davidson, Pistons | Can outbowl Sheed wearing a blindfold.

16. James Dolan, Knicks | Gully MSG escapades offset by role in truly awful rock band.

15. Glen Taylor, Wolves | Once punched Kevin Garnett in the nose.

14. The Atlanta Clusterf*ck, Hawks | Makin' Yahoo! look like a dreamjob.

13. Michael Heisley, Grizzlies

12. Richard Peddie, Raptors | Once busted for moonshine Absinthe.

11. Mickey Arison, Heat | Riley's South Beach wingman.

10. George Shinn, Hornets | A poor man's Bennett. Little upside, but near his peak.

9. Donald Sterling, Clippers | Lights cigars with traveler's checks, creates fake charities just for kicks.

8. Sen. Herb Kohl, Bucks | Subpoena power, bitch.

7. Paul Allen, Blazers

6.Stan Kroenke, Nuggets | 'Stache of doom.

5. Robert Johnson, Bobcats | Draft day slip due to vociferous Hillary backing.

4. Jerry Buss, Lakers | DUIs and Paris Hilton. And a PhD, for the academic set.

3. Bruce Ratner, Nets | Brooklyn and Hova. America's at attention for the next decade.

2. Clay Bennett, Sonics | Like Darko, Bennett's got bodies back there.

1. Joe and Gavin Ma-f*ckin-loof.

I don't see your owners poppin' up in Lil' Wayne videos.

1 recs | Comment 18 comments

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Comments

Bullets

Im glad to know now Im not the only one annoyed by having to call the Bullets the, wait, what are they now? Hell no. They are still the Bullets

by Chris The Greek on Apr 30, 2008 7:14 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs

Lil' Maloofs

Glad you liked the link TZ.

If yr not happy with the results, lower yr expectations.

by tokyo on Apr 30, 2008 9:10 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs

Yes, I should note tokyo alerted me to the Maloofs’ presence in Lil Wayne’s video. I would not otherwise have known. Honest.

by Ziller on Apr 30, 2008 9:15 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

Oh yeah

I meant to comment on that on StR. I was shocked when I saw thw Maloofs in Wayne’s video. I wonder if they provided the hookers?

by Mityt on Apr 30, 2008 1:56 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

Probably

I think they’re included in the $6,000 burger combo meal.

SACTOWN ROYALTY - Try our thick creamy shakes!

by section214 on Apr 30, 2008 2:03 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

In Larry Miller's defense

He’s pretty damn street for the state of Utah.

Muff rules. http://vegaskings.blogspot.com

by Muff209 on Apr 30, 2008 9:57 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs

In my opinion*

they’ve all jumped the shark. Their vote on the Seattle SuperSonics franchise sealed the deal for me.

Bastards. If I didn’t love basketball so much, I’d boycott the NBA..

Incredibly savvy smart businessmen buy an NBA franchise and begin claiming they were duped into buying a money losing business? Puhlease.

I wish I was as stupid as they are, I would be able to retire at a fairly young age.

*This rant presented by the only person on Earth who voted for Measures Q and R. [Rhetorical overstatement of the facts] (not linked because I couldn’t find one that referenced the debacle’s final tally.)

God bless you, Corliss. You always played as though you knew how expensive my tickets were. -section214

by KK on Apr 30, 2008 11:03 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs

I can't believe you voted for a losing cause

Pfftttt!

No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. It's simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get tangled, you tango on

by pookeyguru on Apr 30, 2008 11:41 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

Yeah, I know...

I’m pathetic like that.

God bless you, Corliss. You always played as though you knew how expensive my tickets were. -section214

by KK on Apr 30, 2008 11:56 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

I was one of the 70%

and had the Maloof’s not been such doofus douche’s during the whole process I would have one of the 30% who voted for it.

No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. It's simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get tangled, you tango on

by pookeyguru on May 1, 2008 2:08 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

I voted yes as well

"Boo Lakers! Boo Kobe! Go Kings! Go Giants! Boo Dodgers!" - my 5 year-old daughter - 4/15/08

by otis29 on May 1, 2008 5:09 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

Disclaimer:

if the vote was taken today, I’d have voted differently.

God bless you, Corliss. You always played as though you knew how expensive my tickets were. -section214

by KK on Apr 30, 2008 11:31 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs

Hey

At least you had a vote. Us Stockton folk just have to sit here and hope.

Muff rules. http://vegaskings.blogspot.com

by Muff209 on May 1, 2008 7:25 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs

Then move to Sacramento for the next one :)

No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. It's simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get tangled, you tango on

by pookeyguru on May 1, 2008 11:36 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

It's a proud day to be a Kings fan.

But I think the Maloofs are about as “street” as THIS.

TickTickTickTickTickTick

by LeaguePassAddict on May 1, 2008 11:21 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs

Nice one LPA

The Malloofs may be as “street” as that, but they aren’t quite as “street” as This

by Kfan in Korea on May 1, 2008 12:22 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

Dude!

Hilarious!

TickTickTickTickTickTick

by LeaguePassAddict on May 1, 2008 4:50 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

insanity runs in families

i am sure the maloofs have already warranted the attention of every law enforcement agency at the local and federal level, now they readily aline themselves with yet another person of questionable reputation, whatever happened with sports heroes, and businessmen your son could emulate? These two just don’t care…....

by trouble on May 10, 2008 7:01 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs