Haikus are Easy
But sometimes they don't make sense.
Refrigerator.
After the jump, Haikus for each of our Kings! (For those who don't know, Haikus are 3 sentence poems. The first and last of which have 5 syllables, with the middle sentence having 7.)
How weird your shot is.
And yet the ball still goes in.
How remarkable.
They say you can't shoot.
They say you can't play Point Guard.
They shall be in awe.
A Center must bang.
But you refuse to comply.
You are still Hawesome.
You've shocked the world once.
You should do it again please.
Unleash yourself man.
Omri, we love you.
We don't yet really care why.
But we think you'll do.
You used to be fat.
But then you joined Weight Watchers.
Now you are just Phat.
Why do you do this?
You are too inconsistent.
Please perform better.
Why did we sign you?
Oh ya, you defend alright.
I guess you can stay.
Work on your game please.
Then maybe we'll let you shoot.
Until then, D-League.
Why are you so mad?
Who is it that pissed you off?
Please do not hurt me.
You pass the ball well.
But you can't shoot it at all.
Stick to the passing.
Oh poor Francisco.
I hope your arm gets better.
We will miss you tons.
Pancakes will fear you.
But not as much as Sean May.
He still likes to eat.
Alright your guys turn, hope you enjoyed these.
(This is a FanPost from a member of the Sactown Royalty community. The views expressed come from the member, and not Sactown Royalty staff.)
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Comments
You shouldn’t talk man.
You’re not doing it correct.
5-7-5, dude.
Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.
"...I would show how bad I am at it."
You are a success
You have shown your suck-i-tude
at writing Haiku
Ball movement ... is like jogging for most people: They do it occasionally, and it makes them happy. Then they go back to not doing it. - Henry Abbott
by Kfan in Korea on Oct 23, 2009 3:26 PM PDT up reply actions
strangely enough
that sentence would qualify
by VenomySnicket on Oct 25, 2009 11:11 PM PDT up reply actions
Holy Crap you're right
It’s either the cleverest comment ever, or a really funny coincidence.
Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.
Haiku doesn’t rhyme, either.
The draft lottery has reinforced my belief that there are not enough bad words in the English language.
by LeaguePassAddict on Oct 23, 2009 7:07 AM PDT up reply actions
OK had some coffee now
Sorry, didn’t mean to be so negative. Here is another bad one.
Fell from royal grace
Through paid off refs on the take
Faker champs emerged
tossed one off
Martin is the man
Reke shows we have a new plan
Just one more big man!
So imitate the action of the tiger!.
Lend the eye a terrible aspect
- and teach them how to war!
Henry V iii
used man twice - bad form
Omri is a steal
Tyreke shows all he’s for real
Our dog we will deal
So imitate the action of the tiger!.
Lend the eye a terrible aspect
- and teach them how to war!
Henry V iii
I could do this all day
Now deep at the one
oh one more big would be plum
a season of fun
So imitate the action of the tiger!.
Lend the eye a terrible aspect
- and teach them how to war!
Henry V iii
your haiku stylings remind me of Fezzik
Aykis sixteen thinks
Fesenko is a hoops Fezzik
inconceivable!

my name is NOT Krylyo!
by betweentheeyes on Oct 23, 2009 1:53 PM PDT up reply actions
Kev’s ankles, Cisco’s wrists,
Spencer’s knees and Noce’s wits,
Starters sit, Greene plays.
Victory is tasty.
This is stupid
And getting sad. Stop commenting. For the sake of Sacramento and the kings, please stop.
Don't hate, I'm a realist!
Once more, THEY AREN"T SUPPOSED TO RHYME.
n., pl., haiku, also -kus.
1. A Japanese lyric verse form having three unrhymed lines of five, seven, and five syllables, traditionally invoking an aspect of nature or the seasons.
2. A poem written in this form.
The draft lottery has reinforced my belief that there are not enough bad words in the English language.
by LeaguePassAddict on Oct 23, 2009 10:51 AM PDT reply actions
One more thing
Poetry is about imagery and emotion. The things you guys are writing are more suited to limerick.
So, yeah, I’m with Sammy. Stop now before you hurt someone.
The draft lottery has reinforced my belief that there are not enough bad words in the English language.
by LeaguePassAddict on Oct 23, 2009 10:53 AM PDT up reply actions
I don't write haiku's
So I don’t have the slightest clue of what you speak of lady.
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
That didn't stop me
Completely clueless and willing to go out on that limb…
I just should not have taken the saw with me though. I just could not resist the urge to saw…
no rule about rhyming but
I know its not pure
from my sad useless degree
fun and sunshine play
So imitate the action of the tiger!.
Lend the eye a terrible aspect
- and teach them how to war!
Henry V iii
by lietothegirls on Oct 23, 2009 10:58 AM PDT up reply actions
I'm aware rhyming is bad form
this is a sports blog
lighten up
So imitate the action of the tiger!.
Lend the eye a terrible aspect
- and teach them how to war!
Henry V iii
by lietothegirls on Oct 23, 2009 11:00 AM PDT up reply actions
I never drink coffee
So you’ll have to blame my crankiness on something else.
Like the fact that I actually like poetry and what you guys are writing is like fingernails on a blackboard.
(And you thought I just got cranky about punctuation and stuff) ;-p
The draft lottery has reinforced my belief that there are not enough bad words in the English language.
by LeaguePassAddict on Oct 23, 2009 12:52 PM PDT up reply actions
I would never suggest you were cranky
That would be undignified and ungentlemen like.
Your responses always suggest a deeply mannerous regard of just how low the unrefined remarks of us impertinate twits display an ongoing disorganization of disparite facts we conjure up to ill-advisedly support erroneous and unkempt opinions we cannot otherwise hold true.
You have messed it up
The word is spelled “disparate”
Watch LPA steam.
fine
a crown without teeth
from smoke and empty seat echos
sparks smoulder and bite!
So imitate the action of the tiger!.
Lend the eye a terrible aspect
- and teach them how to war!
Henry V iii
I do need spell check though
So imitate the action of the tiger!.
Lend the eye a terrible aspect
- and teach them how to war!
Henry V iii
by lietothegirls on Oct 23, 2009 11:11 AM PDT up reply actions
Welcome to the lttg comment thread.........
:P
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
People should relax
Autumn snow, Season start
Fesenko is terrible
Aykis makes fun threads
Professional Hyperbole Slayer
by ForThree on Oct 23, 2009 12:06 PM PDT reply actions 1 recs
Shoes squeak on wood floor.
Crowd clad in purple, black.
Pre-game excitement.
The draft lottery has reinforced my belief that there are not enough bad words in the English language.
by LeaguePassAddict on Oct 23, 2009 12:59 PM PDT reply actions
Or heightened it.....
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Well
everything has to rhyme or I don’t get. Giving me a Haiku is like giving me a Chevrolet. It all seems like a backwards Ford.
What's a Chevrolet?
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Well..
There are just so many ways to describe…
Suffice it to say that it is an inferior breed of americana that lacks originality and creativity.
It is a rhyming Haiku, a flat basketball, replacement refs, or anything else that is an incomplete portrayal of an otherwise remarkable thing.
my legit one was better
So imitate the action of the tiger!.
Lend the eye a terrible aspect
- and teach them how to war!
Henry V iii
by lietothegirls on Oct 23, 2009 3:36 PM PDT up reply actions
There once was a team from Sactown
That played in a way that made us all frown.
Then Casspi and ‘Reke
made us all start to freak –
Now we’re all worried that one day they’ll leave town.
Haiku? It’s all about the limerick, biatches!
SACTOWN ROYALTY - Try our thick creamy shakes!
by section214 on Oct 23, 2009 1:14 PM PDT reply actions 7 recs
Limerick has important meter;
And the rhyme is important. ‘Sactown’ has emphasizes the ‘Sac’, so something like ‘back down’ would be much more fitting.
There once was a team from ol’ Sactown-
Climbed up to the top then fell back down.
They ranked last in the polls
so the site filled with trolls
who received and deserved Section’s smackdown.
m*****f***ing c***s***ing peanut butter and jelly!! f*** f*** f***!!!
by JediLeroy on Oct 24, 2009 4:04 PM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
Oh COOL!
A rhyming DUEL
Section 214 of such illustrious fame.
Will take on all challengers and rule the day.
His recs will beat you into a pulp and put you away.
by MustangMBS on Oct 23, 2009 1:40 PM PDT reply actions 1 recs
I like it
You’re up to the limerick.
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Thanks
Limericks I got in spades.
The Haiku is my bane when it comes to poetic refrain. It is a discordant bit of text to which I bring only pain. Especially to those of poetic prowess like LPA and others more versed in this terse bit that I find such a curse.
what light through yonder window breaks...
He played and was honored
His decisions awarded
Will the end be good? ….ode to Geoff Petrie
There once was a fellow with speeches
who maligned those in audible reaches
I will yell what I say!
Bluster rules the day!
And for crying out loud don’t call me Peaches
FanHouse, StR
He’s even here when away
you are everywhere …. ode to Tom Ziller
rhymin' (simple) Simon
the Horry story made me sorry
Brock a lock to jock clock on a block knock
Maloof roof not fool proof
by betweentheeyes on Oct 23, 2009 2:30 PM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
Just take a seat
get paid millions of dollars
Kenny Thomas (Woof!)
Disclaimer: comments may have been made under the influence of alcohol. If the Kings start winning, this will probably change.
revised
You just take a seat
get paid millions of dollars
Kenny Thomas (Woof!)
Disclaimer: comments may have been made under the influence of alcohol. If the Kings start winning, this will probably change.
revision # 2
Just take a seat and
get paid millions of dollars
Kenny Thomas (Woof!)
Disclaimer: comments may have been made under the influence of alcohol. If the Kings start winning, this will probably change.
I knew i should'nt have waisted my time reading this.
Miguel Cotto will defeat Pacquiao on November 14, 2009! For PUERTO RICO baby..
Yeah
You should have gone to school instead.
Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.
by Aykis16 on Oct 23, 2009 3:24 PM PDT up reply actions 2 recs
LOL @ that
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
I don't know Aykis
It’s not like school teaches you to think…..
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Helps you to spell correctly at least
Well, hopefully.
Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.
Tru tru
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Sorry if i hurt your feelings Aykis
but if i need to go to school i think you need to get a job! Word today is job J-O-B.
Miguel Cotto will defeat Pacquiao on November 14, 2009! For PUERTO RICO baby..
Thanks.
I’ll let my employer know that I need another job.
Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.
Of which your employer will be thrilled to hear no doubt....
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
But not a job as a hack that criticizes others for contributing to a site in their spare time
That job appears to be filled.
SACTOWN ROYALTY - Try our thick creamy shakes!
by section214 on Oct 23, 2009 11:44 PM PDT up reply actions 2 recs
Zing!
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Weird, I thought it was J-O-I-B-APOSTROPHE-N-T
m*****f***ing c***s***ing peanut butter and jelly!! f*** f*** f***!!!
Here's an ode to Tyreke's ROY campaign
Poor, poor Blake Griffin
Broken kneecap sounds painful
Clips curse strikes again
www.mancancook.net
or... another Blake Griifn haiku
A Clippers jersey
A career of great promise
Embody the ouch!
by betweentheeyes on Oct 27, 2009 7:06 PM PDT up reply actions

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