The Mystical Caverns of the Valley of Kings.
In the Valley of Kings, the land that men call Sacramento, there exists a series of mystical caverns, which the locals call "Arcorena". In the past, these caverns and her creatures proved dangerous and often fatal to unwanted foreigners passing through. Few passed through and lived to tell the tale.
But since the exodus of the great Warden Adelman and the disappearance of some of the older and stronger creatures, passage has been relatively safe. Warriors from different lands were easily able to pass through, for the creatures within offered little resistance, and several pretenders to the title of Warden failed to gain control long enough to do much of anything.
But a new Warden has arrived from the foreign land of Westphalia, and since his arrival, the caverns have become much more dangerous. Travelers disappear and do not return, and the ones that do survive tell of strange, new creatures, that attack with an amazing ferocity.
Two giants live within the caves some say. The taller one, although more skilled than the other at slaughtering opponents in melee, takes a savage pleasure in throwing boulders at his victims from a distance. The older one prefers to wear his victims down, as he is filled with seemingly limitless stamina and seems immune to normal injuries. He also excels at finishing the work the other creatures started.
Then there is one of the newer creatures, the beast known as Jewbacca. It's rage is palpable, and it goes for its opponents heart each and every time. Looking into its face can whither even the strongest man's resolve. Strangely, this creature seems to have trouble killing an opponent when they are completely helpless, but reports are that this is slowly becoming less of a problem, as we were warned by Lawrence of Frankia, who lost many of his men to this faulty strategy, and who himself died shortly thereafter from his wounds.
Others speak of a creature even more frightening, a creature that feasts on cakes it makes of men. They call this force of nature the Brock Ness Monster. It is not the most skilled of monsters, but it is relentless in its attacks, and will continue to bash its enemies into submission, even at the cost of hurting itself. Nobody is safe from the Brock Ness Monster, not even the other creatures of the caves.
By far the most versatile monster of the caverns is the Point Gerberus, a three headed beast that has few weaknesses. The middle and most prominent head is also the fiercest, constantly attacking and snapping at its preys ankles, hoping to break them and render it immobile and humbled. It also confuses its prey by misleading it and making the prey believe that its not a real Point Gerberus, but something else altogether.
The left head is at its most dangerous when things are going badly for the Point Gerberus, and then it attacks with a quiet ferocity that drains the opponents momentum. Few had trouble with this head last year, when it appeared morose and lax, but the new Warden has instilled a new vigor and energy into it.
The right head is quick as lightning, and is highly skilled at leading its opponents to be eaten by the other creatures of the caverns. But it has no problem landing the killing blow itself.
There are other creatures in the caverns as well of course, and some say the Warden is nursing a couple of the more powerful ones back to health as we speak. Who knows how dangerous the caverns and its inhabitants will be then.
So be wary if you must travel through Arcorena, my friends. Even if you survive, the journey will be arduous. Don't say ye weren't warned of your peril.
(This is a FanPost from a member of the Sactown Royalty community. The views expressed come from the member, and not Sactown Royalty staff.)
69 comments
|
25 recs |
Do you like this story?
Comments
lovin that three heaed beast
"I make love to pressure" - Stephen Jackson
Two thoughts
1. As awesome as this is, you know that every time you post something that isn’t a continuation of “D.K. and the HoH”, i die a little bit inside.
2. How can I make Jewbacca my avitar pic?
"Sometimes the capriciousness of youth anesthetizes common sense." -Let Geoff's words guide our patience this season.
by AnotherStupidSN on Dec 4, 2009 10:22 AM PST reply actions
Copy the picture to your hard drive
Then go into your profile on SBN and go to the profile section of your SBN account. There will be a box for pictures , and a box says browse. Just find the picture off your hard drive and that’ll be that. SBN will do the cropping for you.
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
Thanks
I had to get creative on adding some extra space around it (the SBN crop butchered it a bit), but I think I’m happy with it now. My first ever profile pic, so thanks Aykis and I hope you don’t mind because I’m not waiting for your permission.
"Sometimes the capriciousness of youth anesthetizes common sense." -Let Geoff's words guide our patience this season.
by AnotherStupidSN on Dec 4, 2009 12:46 PM PST up reply actions
Yeah I see that
Good job with the modifications.
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
ASSN, Tell me if you're not serious
I was going to do it myself – but you have ’dibs.
So imitate the action of the tiger!.
Lend the eye a terrible aspect
- and teach them how to war!
Henry V iii
by lietothegirls on Dec 4, 2009 11:41 AM PST up reply actions
Thanks, it's mine
It wouldn’t feel right not having Inigo around anyways.
"Sometimes the capriciousness of youth anesthetizes common sense." -Let Geoff's words guide our patience this season.
by AnotherStupidSN on Dec 4, 2009 12:47 PM PST up reply actions
You have an Antonio Banderas picture
I actually preferred that one to the pic of Inigo you have up.
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
Great!
So imitate the action of the tiger!.
Lend the eye a terrible aspect
- and teach them how to war!
Henry V iii
Lets hope the creatures of the Cave walls
will multiply and lend even more fierce energy to its newly dangerous masters.
So imitate the action of the tiger!.
Lend the eye a terrible aspect
- and teach them how to war!
Henry V iii
by lietothegirls on Dec 4, 2009 10:57 AM PST up reply actions
I couldn't think of a good enough analogy for the fans
although I tried.
Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.
Sir Aykis the Grimm
You may have just outdone yourself.
Rec’d.
From the people who brought you Reggie Musselnatt.
by My Losing Season on Dec 4, 2009 11:03 AM PST reply actions
Very nice Aykis
Very nice indeed.
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
Hawesome
"Even when I’m old and grey, I won’t be able to play it, but I’ll still love the game." — Michael Jordan
Go Kings!
Required viewing
There should be a section on StR that is required viewing and Aykis’ stuff needs to be front and center.
Agreed
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
Keep raising the bar for the mere mortals, jackass!
Rec’d.
"When you look at him, you say: 'Holy God.'" - Pete Carril on Tyreke Evans
Unless I'm mistaken, Aykis
I think Otis just called you an immortal jackass.
There could be a compliment in there somewhere, but I wouldn’t swear to it.
From the people who brought you Reggie Musselnatt.
by My Losing Season on Dec 4, 2009 1:12 PM PST up reply actions 1 recs
This was great.
G, clean out your desk.
SACTOWN ROYALTY - Try our thick creamy shakes!
by section214 on Dec 4, 2009 1:20 PM PST reply actions 1 recs
You're a tough crowd LOL
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
I had a desk?
Master Ziller has just made me sleep on a bed of newspapers in the corner.
Never forget: I am a complete idiot
Haha!
That was great. Thanks for the laugh!
Go Kings.
Blessings.Love.Peace
by lifestyleforthesellout on Dec 4, 2009 3:38 PM PST reply actions
Awesome, well done.
and a much better “Point Gerberus” than mine.
Ball movement ... is like jogging for most people: They do it occasionally, and it makes them happy. Then they go back to not doing it. - Henry Abbott
Rec'd
Nobody is safe from the Brock Ness Monster, not even the other creatures of the caves.
As long as he stays away from ’Reke’s ankles and Hawes’ knees. He can barbecue K9 with his flame breath though for all I care…
Vanquish the Foe, a BYU Cougars blog at SB Nation
Well Sroufe
Do you really want K9 given that he plays quality post defense & is one of the better rebounders on this team?
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
K9 gone^
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
$8,775,000
Sorry, I should have said K9’s contract. I’m not ignorant to the contributions he’s made under Adelman and Westphal, I just can’t wait for that cap-space!
Vanquish the Foe, a BYU Cougars blog at SB Nation
And what would you propose the Kings do with it?
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
Bet it all -

And always bet on black.
SACTOWN ROYALTY - Try our thick creamy shakes!
by section214 on Dec 4, 2009 9:06 PM PST up reply actions 2 recs
I love Money Train
Why I have no idea, but I did.
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
Make it rain bro...

Vanquish the Foe, a BYU Cougars blog at SB Nation
by sroufe on Dec 5, 2009 2:44 PM PST up reply actions 1 recs
Nice!
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
Aykis has some genius doesn't he? LOL
(No, that’s not mocking.)
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
I do have some genius
He’s locked in my basement and I force him to write fanposts for me for food.
Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.
by Aykis16 on Dec 4, 2009 9:28 PM PST up reply actions 1 recs
I knew there was a secret
I wish I had a basement to lock a genius in. :(
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
Will write fanposts for food
It’s how I survive.
From the people who brought you Reggie Musselnatt.
by My Losing Season on Dec 4, 2009 10:59 PM PST up reply actions
So you finally got hungry after a 2 1/2 month absence?
I’m impressed.
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
They won't get it.
Trust me.
"Sometimes the capriciousness of youth anesthetizes common sense." -Let Geoff's words guide our patience this season.
by AnotherStupidSN on Dec 4, 2009 9:40 PM PST up reply actions
They'll just write something stupid....
….like this.
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
That is awesome.
TZ is at his best when he’s snarky.
Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.
My favorite of the post
And I forgot about it until just now by reading the comments, was that somebody called TZ a twat. Yes, I know. It still boggles my mind how you can call a dude a twat and have it be insulting.
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
Nevermind
He was called a twat on Fanhouse. The force runs strong in the stupid one’s.
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
That was a crazy time around her
I’ll be honest. Trolls are fun sometimes. At least you have someone new to make fun off. Making fun of Pookey gets old
Godfather of the "nice ass" movement.... the future begins now...
Not for some
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
I did my share of Pookey making fun of
Happened to be my most rec’d post. Until this one.
Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.
If I don't exist to be made fun of...
..what do I exist for?
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
Peeing on.
Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.
Over or under?
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
Yes.
Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.
Eric Maynor > Aykis
I’d just like to let you know that.
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
You've done it MBS!!!
That’s my new avatar! Quite awesome!
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
You can have it
It’s yours.
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea
Nah
Maybe sometime in the future. Me & Pooh are tight for the time being.
No mistakes in the tango, darling. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
Oh, hes in the laegue two and Jayson Thomson and that Boggins dude on Milwokee, and Occur for the Jizz. Its a talented laegue.--Kfan in Korea

by 





















