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30Q: Will the Kings Land a Jersey Sponsor?

30Q asks the important questions about the Kings all through September.


The NBA is now allowing teams to sell ad space on their practice jerseys. The Nets and Suns have found sponsors -- the Suns pulled "mid six figures" for a sponsorship of their practice jerseys and practice court. The Maloofs had previously embraced the NBA decision, and I suspect will have a sponsor soon.

But whom?

I'm bad at funny, so I'm playing it straight and going with the obvious choice.

Carlsjr_medium

Fast food chain Carl's Jr. has already sponsored everything from team web videos to photos of the Sacramento Kings Dance Team's tour of Iraq (seriously) to Chuck Person's job. Why not the jerseys, too? ($6 Double Bacon Western is a heckuva pregame meal, I hear. It's the real reason Greg Ostertag is trying to come back.)

More realistic options after the jump. Your hilarious suggestions in the comments.

Star-divide

When 110% awareness saturation isn't enough, there's the Palms practice jersey!

Palms_medium

According to a big Bee story last week, a mess of legislators attended the Chris Webber jersey retirement on lobbyists' dimes. So why don't we just cut out the middle man and have the state government sponsor the team?

State_medium 

And now completely unrelated, but owing to the fact that I got a bit hopped up on multivitamins and coffee early this morning and got unhinged with the Photoshop, my interpretation of a meme that happened to coincide with a Skeets call to action.

 Tyreke_kanye_medium

And the reaction shot ...

Salmons_react_medium 

9 recs  |  Comment 90 comments |

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Comments

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Oh my god.

That Kanye pic had me in stitches. Alright I’m gonna have to fire up the photoshop now.

Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.

by Aykis16 on Sep 16, 2009 12:44 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

The California Lottery

I’ll let someone else do the Photoshop.

"Sometimes the capriciousness of youth anesthetizes common sense." -Let Geoff's words guide our patience this season.

by AnotherStupidSN on Sep 16, 2009 12:47 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

(Nudges Akis16)

"Sometimes the capriciousness of youth anesthetizes common sense." -Let Geoff's words guide our patience this season.

by AnotherStupidSN on Sep 16, 2009 12:48 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Subway-

With this:

<- $5 Foot Long →

Across the front of the players shorts. Maybe some vertical hands on the players hips to encase the writing.

"Or, as Randy Jackson would say: Not feelin’ it, dawg."
-bench-blob- posting virgin.

by jjham15 on Sep 16, 2009 12:52 PM PDT reply actions   1 recs

Who Cares???

Purveyor of Bull Plop

by SayWhat? on Sep 16, 2009 12:52 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Seriously!

Who cares about the franchise generating revenue?

Who cares what organizations are associated with the Kings?

Who cares about a fun opportunity to share some laughs with photoshopped suggestions?

Never forget: I am a complete idiot

by Exhibit G on Sep 16, 2009 1:05 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Say What?

The future begins now...

by eduardo_m7 on Sep 16, 2009 1:38 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Sorry

I was trying to convey my sarcasm.

Never forget: I am a complete idiot

by Exhibit G on Sep 16, 2009 1:42 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

The Photoshopping is cool!

My “Who Cares” was re: practice jersey sponsors. How many fans are 1) At the game an hour before to even see the jerseys, and 2) How many fans will run out and buy wood chips or paint or God knows what because of name and product placement. I’m more concerned with how well the Kings will play in 09-10.

Purveyor of Bull Plop

by SayWhat? on Sep 16, 2009 2:39 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Got milk?

Could work for a a jersey sponsor, but for SayWhat? it should be:

Got a sense of humor?

by MustangMBS on Sep 16, 2009 3:07 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

No problem.

Hard to have a sense of humor with the direction this team has been going the last couple of years. Hoping for a better on-court product this year. Hoping, hoping, hoping…

Purveyor of Bull Plop

by SayWhat? on Sep 16, 2009 3:21 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

What is that saying...

Sometimes you got to either laugh or cry.

I take hilarity any day.

by MustangMBS on Sep 16, 2009 5:57 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I think Say What?'s sponsor should be Massengil...

…you know, cause they’re both douche bags.

"We ain't in the takin' prisoners business. We in the killin' Nazi's business...and Cousin, business is a-boomin'."

by PhutureKings on Sep 16, 2009 3:19 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

SNL tie-in

Garrett Morris announcing: Lord and Lady Doucha-Bag…

You see, I do have a sense of humor. Misguided as it may be…

Purveyor of Bull Plop

by SayWhat? on Sep 16, 2009 3:23 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Good to Know.

There was actually some redeeming quality in there (meaning you are less of a douche, Sir), so I’ll let Massengil-Lite be your sponsor.

Or a GPS manufacturer, given your tendency for misguidance. Lol.

"We ain't in the takin' prisoners business. We in the killin' Nazi's business...and Cousin, business is a-boomin'."

by PhutureKings on Sep 16, 2009 3:26 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Thank You

Very little. (laughing my ass off)

Purveyor of Bull Plop

by SayWhat? on Sep 16, 2009 3:54 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Me too

The future begins now...

by eduardo_m7 on Sep 16, 2009 3:46 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Wow, totally missed that

That’ll teach you to be too clever.

Never forget: I am a complete idiot

by Exhibit G on Sep 16, 2009 3:57 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Wow

Mancakes with the IHOP logo is fantastic.

Never forget: I am a complete idiot

by Exhibit G on Sep 16, 2009 1:07 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Ha thanks. I'm working on a couple more that should be good.

Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.

by Aykis16 on Sep 16, 2009 1:08 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

LOL.

Given’ ’em that Boom Boom Pow, my man!

"We ain't in the takin' prisoners business. We in the killin' Nazi's business...and Cousin, business is a-boomin'."

by PhutureKings on Sep 16, 2009 3:20 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

The Brockman one is awesome

I’d love to see Jon’s face when someone introduces him to StR for the first time:

“Holy Sh##, they know about the pancakes? Who the F### are these people… and who the F### is ‘Mancakes’?!?”

"Sometimes the capriciousness of youth anesthetizes common sense." -Let Geoff's words guide our patience this season.

by AnotherStupidSN on Sep 16, 2009 1:16 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I'm sure Spencer can explain it

Never forget: I am a complete idiot

by Exhibit G on Sep 16, 2009 1:21 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I'm pretty sure Spence is a regular STR user

Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.

by Aykis16 on Sep 16, 2009 1:23 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Haha

Ahh you beat me to the punch. I was about to suggest the IHOP thing for Brock. Nice one!

by CloudyEyes on Sep 16, 2009 1:23 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Give me suggestions guys

I’ve got a couple ideas I’m working on, but if you have any more that’d be good.

Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.

by Aykis16 on Sep 16, 2009 1:19 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Please do the Lottery one

"Sometimes the capriciousness of youth anesthetizes common sense." -Let Geoff's words guide our patience this season.

by AnotherStupidSN on Sep 16, 2009 1:21 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Just for you

Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.

by Aykis16 on Sep 16, 2009 1:31 PM PDT up reply actions   1 recs

Beautiful

"Sometimes the capriciousness of youth anesthetizes common sense." -Let Geoff's words guide our patience this season.

by AnotherStupidSN on Sep 16, 2009 1:41 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

In my mind

across the back of this jersey it says “Turning Losers into Winners”, or some such.

"Sometimes the capriciousness of youth anesthetizes common sense." -Let Geoff's words guide our patience this season.

by AnotherStupidSN on Sep 16, 2009 2:17 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

In mine it says

“When you think the NBA draft lottery screws you over, the CA lottery is a lot worse!”

Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.

by Aykis16 on Sep 16, 2009 7:07 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I had a few off the wall ideas

But I don’t have photoshop. I’ll e-mail you so we can maintain the element of surprise.

Never forget: I am a complete idiot

by Exhibit G on Sep 16, 2009 1:22 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Aykis

I hope somebody somewhere is paying you for this skills you so plainly have in abundance!

by MustangMBS on Sep 16, 2009 5:52 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

All our skinny guys

wearing a Sally Struthers for only 1$ a month you could save this starving child’s life shirt.

by passionforPERPS on Sep 17, 2009 9:32 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Yo, Section214's play about the Sactown media...

I’m really happy for you, and I’mma let you finish, but this thread has the potential to be the funniest StR thread of all time! OF ALL TIME!

"Sometimes the capriciousness of youth anesthetizes common sense." -Let Geoff's words guide our patience this season.

by AnotherStupidSN on Sep 16, 2009 1:21 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Burger Kings!

Oh man…I’m dyin’ here. BK for the win! The masks should have to be worn with the practice jerseys. The other team could wear the big Jack head from Jack In The Box! Claaaasic!

by jacquetbg on Sep 16, 2009 4:44 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Only $8.5 Mil and this can be yours!

Hey they pay to put ads on bus stop benches!

"Shut up and Coach!"
Vfettke

by SavageBeast on Sep 16, 2009 1:47 PM PDT reply actions   2 recs

or . . .

"Shut up and Coach!"
Vfettke

by SavageBeast on Sep 16, 2009 2:15 PM PDT up reply actions   3 recs

NICE!!!

Purveyor of Bull Plop

by SayWhat? on Sep 16, 2009 2:41 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Carl's Junior
Carl’s Junior, F-you! I’m dribbling!

by OrangeLazarus on Sep 16, 2009 2:46 PM PDT reply actions   1 recs

Is Salmons making that face because...

Beyonce just farted?

"We ain't in the takin' prisoners business. We in the killin' Nazi's business...and Cousin, business is a-boomin'."

by PhutureKings on Sep 16, 2009 3:27 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Fucking advertising

Pisses me off. We’re inundated with enough ads as it is. Someone needs to hurry up and write an app that detects and blocks ads in live video. Someone smarter than me.

by Carl on Sep 16, 2009 4:04 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Photshop requests

The Diamond aand Gold Vault

Folsom Lake Toyota (extra credit if you put Cody the dog on Kenny Thomas’ jersey)

Good Feet

Or given the economic state of the franchise – Circuit City

SACTOWN ROYALTY - Try our thick creamy shakes!

by section214 on Sep 16, 2009 4:28 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Thought about two of those

Diamond and Gold Vault I couldn’t find a logo via Google Images.

Folsom Lake I’ll do.

Good Feet I’ll put on Casspi’s jersey.

Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.

by Aykis16 on Sep 16, 2009 4:57 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

By the way -

You all are brilliant. A hilarious post and thread.

SACTOWN ROYALTY - Try our thick creamy shakes!

by section214 on Sep 16, 2009 4:29 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Where's the Hometown buffet jersey for Sean?

sorry, had to do it.

funny stuff, everyone.

Ba-da

by Ba-Da Bing on Sep 16, 2009 4:31 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Honestly

I had a picture of Sean May waiting. But I’m gonna give the guy a break.

Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.

by Aykis16 on Sep 16, 2009 4:50 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Just wait til you see the shorts...

I remember when I went from being worth 10 figures down to only 9. Took me three months on the French Riviera to get over it.

Rocks are free, and slingshots easily stolen.

by andy sims on Sep 16, 2009 4:42 PM PDT reply actions   3 recs

Good stuff-

Whores…get your stinky, sweaty whores…

"Or, as Randy Jackson would say: Not feelin’ it, dawg."
-bench-blob- posting virgin.

by jjham15 on Sep 16, 2009 5:02 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Rec'd for the use of 'Ye.

I'm the other guy at Third Quarter Collapse, with a Twitter account.

"Never hate your enemies. It affects your judgement." - Michael Corleone

by erivera7 on Sep 16, 2009 4:51 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Local Politicians donate some money to the Kings organization to provide awareness.

Spencer is not pleased.

Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.

by Aykis16 on Sep 16, 2009 6:19 PM PDT reply actions   2 recs

No Sean May pics yet????

Screw you Knicks! LBJ to the Kings!!!

by Shizzo on Sep 16, 2009 7:44 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I'm giving the guy a break ha.

I was planning on having him wear one with a whole crap ton of logos on it.

Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.

by Aykis16 on Sep 16, 2009 8:00 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Red Lobster.

Father of the "Natt this!" movement and Grandmaster of the "Never let AnotherStupidSN forget what a Sham-Wow is" Order.

by Aykis16 on Sep 16, 2009 7:59 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Gotta be the shopvac

Cause the kings will suck again this year.

Do you smoke grass in space Bowie? Or do you smoke astro turf?

by kangsfan on Sep 16, 2009 8:08 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Suckramento??

The future begins now...

by eduardo_m7 on Sep 16, 2009 8:14 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Another ping pong ball year for sure

But let there be some improvement or I tune out and watch football…

Another year, another chance to hope for the team !!

by FaStRmAn on Sep 16, 2009 8:16 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Like a car wreck

even if it’s bad, I can’t turn away

Do you smoke grass in space Bowie? Or do you smoke astro turf?

by kangsfan on Sep 16, 2009 8:22 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

If Bradb were still here the choice would be obvious

Do you smoke grass in space Bowie? Or do you smoke astro turf?

by kangsfan on Sep 16, 2009 8:18 PM PDT reply actions   1 recs

B52....don't know where the extra b came from

Do you smoke grass in space Bowie? Or do you smoke astro turf?

by kangsfan on Sep 16, 2009 8:19 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

The extra b

must stand for bong.

By the way, my rec finger is beginning to cramp up from this thread.

SACTOWN ROYALTY - Try our thick creamy shakes!

by section214 on Sep 16, 2009 9:28 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Your rec finger?

Damn, I hope rec is short for recommend and not something else.

Ball movement ... is like jogging for most people: They do it occasionally, and it makes them happy. Then they go back to not doing it. - Henry Abbott

by Kfan in Korea on Sep 16, 2009 9:58 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I hope rec ends with ommended and not tum

Do you smoke grass in space Bowie? Or do you smoke astro turf?

by kangsfan on Sep 16, 2009 9:29 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Damnit that was a reply to Section

fail

Do you smoke grass in space Bowie? Or do you smoke astro turf?

by kangsfan on Sep 16, 2009 9:30 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Don't fret

Whenever there is a rectum reference, everyone knows that it was meant as a reply to me.

SACTOWN ROYALTY - Try our thick creamy shakes!

by section214 on Sep 16, 2009 9:32 PM PDT up reply actions   2 recs

oops sorry

I replied to Section before reading this post. Dirty minds think alike I guess.

Ball movement ... is like jogging for most people: They do it occasionally, and it makes them happy. Then they go back to not doing it. - Henry Abbott

by Kfan in Korea on Sep 16, 2009 9:59 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

For some years here in Greece,

 sponsors have managed to even break in the team names. I’d hate to see someday “Sacramento-Walmart Kings”.

Great photoshop work!

by ZenBaller on Sep 16, 2009 10:26 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

That pic of Beyonce and Salmons made me crack up in class today

Thanks a lot man. Ha, i looked like an idiot.

Frank Wren for GM of the Year.
"Wait, bait and bash." - Jason Heyward's personal philosophy.

by mvhsbball on Sep 16, 2009 10:58 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

hysterical

Salmons did great faces whn he wanted too.

So imitate the action of the tiger!.
Lend the eye a terrible aspect
- and teach them how to war!
Henry V iii

by lietothegirls on Sep 17, 2009 8:34 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

All funny stuff

not talking about practice jerseys
- but whoever convinced the general public to pay extra to buy and wear advertising for thier products (started in the 80s)deserves a special place in the Advertising Hall of Fame.

We are suckers all.

So imitate the action of the tiger!.
Lend the eye a terrible aspect
- and teach them how to war!
Henry V iii

by lietothegirls on Sep 17, 2009 8:32 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Practice?

We talking ‘bout practice jerseys!?! Man, Practice Jerseys!?! We ain’t talking ’ bout game jerseys…we ain’t talking ‘bout game jerseys. We talkin’ ’bout practice jerseys, man. Practice jerseys!?!

I’m ‘posed to be a fan being marketed to and we talkin’ ’bout practice jerseys!

"We ain't in the takin' prisoners business. We in the killin' Nazi's business...and Cousin, business is a-boomin'."

by PhutureKings on Sep 18, 2009 1:12 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

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