All right, lunatics. I'm not going to give you a top-15 listing of the draftable players coming into the NBA draft. Frankly, I watch very little college basketball, and I borrow dalt's brain when I need to speak intelligently of these players.
So instead, I've decided to create my top-6 "StR expansion draft". Basically, these are the 6 posters I'd take if I was starting my own board. Yes, I was too lazy to go to 15, as was my intention initially (my blog's going to be a raging success...can you sense it?)
Feel free to post your top 6 in the comments section.
Here we go:
1) Section214 (or as I like to occasionally call him, "Section125", or as some others like to call him, "Section8"). This is really the biggest no-brainer in the history of mankind. This man is the Jordan/LeBron/Magic of StR.
Pros: His basement supercomputer, which holds terabytes of Simpsons GIFS. Also, as Ziller's right-hand man, Section knows where the bodies are buried, and that may come in handy when the inevitable cross-blog war begins.
Cons: He came up snake-eyes in the Kings "Superfan" contest, directly resulting in the loss of a top-3 pick in the lottery a few years back. Also, there's a high probability he is really Xinyue.
2) TZ - a year ago, Ziller would have been the clear #1 choice. However, now that he has successfully breeded, it's unclear if his focus is enough to keep him in the elite category.
Pros: He's TZ bitches! And yes, he's smarter than you.
Cons: Seems to be a cat person. WTF?
3) Pookeyguru - shit, I'm gonna need content for the blog. Dude is prolific.
Pros: Every site worth two squirts of moose piss is gonna need a serious capologist on the payroll.
Cons: He quoted Matchbox 20 in a thread the other day.
4) Savage Beast/League Pass Addict - Like we could take one without the other. They would be the moral center of our new blog.
Pros: This is kind of a sleeper upside type pick, in case Savage Beast turns into the next John Grisham. Plus, it's always fun to see LPA make the newbies cry.
Cons: You can't sexually objectify LPA, since she's filling the "blogmom" role (plus her husband's screename is "Savage Beast").
5) chapuforyou - THAT'S RIGHT! THAT JUST HAPPENED! You know you want him back.
Pros: Screw you, I like him.
Cons: He comes with Nocioni's contract.
6) dalt99 - draft expert extraordinaire, he'll be the Mel Kuiper Jr. of my new blog.
Pros: His pre-draft ranking calculations are so complicated, they made Stephen Hawking cry.
Cons: Punxatawny Phil comes out of his hole more often than dalt shows up on StR.
I'll add my 7-15 in the comments below.