What’s that?  You’d like to know the opinion of a guy who didn’t watch more than 2 minutes of college basketball this year and is basing his interpretations entirely on rumor, hearsay, and mix tapes?  Happy to oblige!

#1  John Wall-  Two Wangs.

#2  DeMarcus Cousins-  Worth the risk, I say.  He could be the next Shaq.  Or, his bad attitude and appetite for fast food could somehow destroy our team and shred the very fabric of time and space.  Or so I hear.

#3  Derrick Favors-  Special athlete, plays defense, grabs rebounds, good character, limited offense, underwhelming college performance, fairly boring mix tape.  Meh, I’m not impressed, but everyone else has this guy near the top so I guess I have to as well so no one laughs at me.

#4  Evan Turner-  Good all-around player.  Maybe great all-around player.  I have a hard time seeing how he’d fit on our team, but he seems like a smart guy, so maybe he’d figure it out and everything would be money.  But I get the feeling that Turner may be destined to always be the best player on a mediocre team (*coughOhioStatecoughcough*).

#5  Wes Johnson-  Have you SEEN his mix tape?  The dunks.  The shooting.  The dunks.  The athleticism.  The dunks.  The length.  The dunks.  The dunks.  Good God, the dunks!  Me wanty.

#6  Xavier Henry-  Very good shooter, athletic, NBA body.  Could be a younger, better Francisco Garcia.  Can’t create his own shot?  Let me introduce you to someone:  this is Tyreke Evans, Master Shot Creator.  If it feels like leather, kid, just shoot it.  Chances are, you’re already open.  Also, D-up and throw down some dunks every once-in-a-while.  Don’t worry about dribbling or passing.  ‘Reke’s got that stuff covered.

#7  Greg Monroe-  Good size, excellent offensive skill, questionable defense and motor.  If that sounds like Spencer Hawes to you, then you fell asleep immediately after the 2007 NBA Draft and just woke up.  You’ve missed three years of Kings basketball in which Spencer Hawes the player has shown that he isn’t very good at being Spencer Hawes the legend.  At least, not at all consistently.  Drafting Monroe doesn’t necessarily mean we’re giving up on Spence.  Maybe there’s room for two "Spencer Hawes"es.  If not, then may the best "Spencer Hawes" win, and may the other one be traded.

#8  Cole Aldrich-  We need a Center.  Aldrich is a Center.  We need help with rebounding and defense on our frontline.  Aldrich seems to do those things.  Will he ever make an All-star team?  Probably not.  But I think it’s reasonable to believe that he could end up being a really good player.

#9  Ekpe Udoh-  Long, athletic, rebounds, defends, still kind of learning the game.  Could turn out great, but kind of a scary pick.  Might never really figure things out.  Loses points for having a difficult first name.

#10  Hassan Whiteside-  The first total "huge risk, huge potential" pick that I’d be willing to make.  Best measurements of any 1st rounder.  Barely needs to jump in order to dunk.  Very raw, but could end up being something very special and be exactly what we need.

#11  Al-Farouq Aminu-  You mean we get another chance to draft Anthony Randolph, but this time with the #5 pick?  Hmmm… pass.

#12  Ed Davis-  I know even less about this guy than most of these other guys, but he seems to be at the top of the next tier of big men, so I’m putting him here since we could really use another big.

#13  Patrick Patterson-  See #12.

#14  Avery Bradley-  Best perimeter defender in the draft, you say?  Decent shooter?  Okay, he’s on the list.

#15  Paul George-  Great athlete, good shooter.  Has been living in Fresno, so we know he can handle adversity.  Chose to live in Fresno, so he has questionable decision-making.