Great changes are coming to the Sacramento Kings experience. Will everyone make the transition seamlessly?
As we all know, from reading this excellent Kings-oriented site, or from watching any of the local newscasts on the myriad slow news days we have, Arco Arena ceases to be on 1 March. On that date, our crappy, outdated arena will magically transform itself into a crappy, outdated pavilion: Power Balance Pavilion.
"Because someone has to have the most embarassing-sounding stadium sponsorship."
We have two things to which we may look forward:
1) All seats and other surfaces will be strongly magnetized.
While you may not receive any health benefit from being around massive quantities of EM, you will definitely receive the mental benefit of not having to worry about having your credit or ATM cards stolen, as they will be wiped of any data ten seconds after you hit the concourse. Many watches will cease functioning, and anyone with joint replacements, metal fillings or seasonal allergies will likely not survive the first half.
And that's not even the good news.
2) Peaches muffing the deal, and referring to it as ARCO.
Being a very special mix of creative and caustic evil, I thought all of us should share in the joy of the moment when The Red Menace causes the new sponsor to begin pressuring the Maloofs to replace him with someone whose personality is more, um, magnetic.
With that in mind, I present the first-ever "When will Peaches Blow It?" pool.
The rules are simple:
Type the date and time when The Scarlet Douchebag will first refer to the newly named venue as "ARCO" or "ARCO Arena" during a Kings telecast. Pre-game and post-game analysis are also fair game, basically anything that occurs on television between the bookend airings of the Maloof logo, which is seriously inviting a lawsuit from the IOC, if you want the truth.
The first home game in March is on the 2nd, so get your guesses in before 7pm on that night. There's always the chance that he may be so focused that evening that instead of wasting the mental effort misstating the amount of fouls a player has, he instead really gives the new sponsor their money's worth. He may wait a few games to blow it, perhaps even referring to "back at ARCO" during a road game later that week. It's anyone's guess.
Now it's your guess.
I have no prizes to offer, or at least nothing that you'd want, given that I tag everything I possess with my DNA in some fashion or other. If Mr. Ziller sees fit to offer a small prize, more
ARCO power (balance) to him, but the main thing will be the satisfaction of seeing Peaches foul up on television once again.
Pool closes 6:59 PM PST, 2 March 2011. Good luck!