I read someone post the other day, "With the 5th pick in the NBA Draft, The Sacramento Kings Center DeMarcus Cousins is hit with a technical!"
I thought it was pretty funny, so I've got a couple of my own for you, and I'd love to hear your own mocks of our pick. Some of them may be too sad to be true "Traded for Salmons and went down in the draft..." and some of them may be more like this:
"With the 5th pick in the 2012 NBA Draft, the Sacramento Kings select George Maloof! The team felt that this was the most cost effective use of the draft pick."
"With the 5th pick in the 2012 NBA Draft, the Sacramento Kings ALSO select Anthony Davis. Apparently the Maloofs have a billionaire friend willing to pay to share Davis' skill set with NOLA."
"With the 5th pick in the 2012 NBA Draft, the Sacramento Kings, the 10th Pick from New Orleans. Not a player. Not a trade. Just the 10th pick. They felt that turning 5 into 10 was a good business practice. You can trust them, they're developers."
"With the 5th pick in the 2012 NBA Draft, the Sacramento Kings select, Thomas Ro--- 'STOP!' George yells! I" know we cried tears of joy a little bit ago about this selection, but we have a red-lined term sheet that is holding up this draft pick. Mr. Commissioner, I think it's fair that we shouldn't have to pay this young man's travel expenses."