And on the 9th day, God looked down on his planned paradise and said, "I need an immovable force." So God made a Kings Fan. God said, "I need somebody willing to get up each day, wear purple, talk basketball all day, ring cowbells, eat supper and then go to town and stay past midnight at the local bar talking basketball some more." So God made a Kings Fan. "I need somebody with hands strong enough to clap for four quarters, and yet gentle enough to tuck a tired child into bed that night, clutching a Slamson doll, with licorice stains on her cheeks. Somebody to cheer players, boo the opposing team, come home spent, have to wait until the night’s highlights are shown on TV before bedtime…and enjoy it." So God made a Kings Fan. God said, "I need somebody willing to sit up all night crying over the season that could’ve been. Then wipe his eyes and say, 'Maybe next year.' I need somebody who can find a way to get excited in July, call his friends about the newest draft pick, who can find the bright side in a loss, make signs and wave pom-poms. And who, despite the pressures of the real world, will finish his forty-hour week by Tuesday noon, hit up the message boards and team forums, and put in another seventy-two hours typing hope and prayers." So God made a Kings Fan. "I need someone who has tasted just enough success in the past, that they spend their lives chasing that same dream. Someone who can go through the highest of highs, and stand strong when the world doubts them, their city, or tries to rip away that which they hold most dear, all the while smiling and baring their teeth for the fight." So God made a Kings Fan. God had to have somebody willing to ride a 10 game losing streak while the NBA world laughed at them, yet stop other fans in their tracks with their pure, unbridled love affair with their team. So God made a Kings Fan. God said, "I need somebody strong enough to not always make the playoffs, yet gentle enough to give a standing ovation when a traded player returns home wearing different colors, who will leave the dinner table in the middle of family time to talk to a friend, phoning in the latest team gossip. It had to be somebody who never wavered in his belief. Somebody to cheer, sneer, drink a beer and shed a tear, all in the name of supporting that in which he holds most dear. One who believes in never giving up until the clock reads all zeroes, and even then reminding anyone who will listen how tomorrow will be better and brighter and filled with promise. Always tomorrow, knowing that someday tomorrow will become today. So God made a Kings Fan. "Somebody who'd gather his family together with the soft strong bonds of sharing, who would laugh and then sigh, and then reply, with smiling eyes, when his son says he wants to spend his life 'banging cowbells like Mom and Dad do." So God made a Kings Fan.