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GAME 12/82: vs. New Jersey, Open Game Thread

The Nets franchise is fascinating. I wholeheartedly support its move to Brooklyn - little could do more for the NBA than sticking a team in Brooklyn. One thing that could? It involves a parade and J Street.

Count me among those who pray to the basketball gods that Carter, Kidd and Jefferson are still with the team when they move. Jersey sales will be unreal - they'll even surpass the vaunted Oakland Randy Moss jersey and the long-awaited Rudy Gay jersey, once he joins the Heat.

Speaking of jersey sales, I don't know many people lining up to get their Nenad Krstic #12. But if they'd just stick his first name on the back - Nene style - they'd get some buyers. What a fun name. Nenad. Say it. Nenad.

(And my gay jokes and genital jokes are officially over. You may proceed.)

Vinsanity (imagine how tasteless that nickname will be once the guy gets Alzheimer's) may not play tonight; he apparently strained something or other against the Warriors Tuesday.

My guess is that he just wanted to watch Lindsay Lohan on the American Music Awards. I'm also guessing that he's not a fan of "Two and a Half Men," so he'll probably show up at ARCO tonight.

Peja's status is also apparently up in the air. I'm not listening to 1140, though, so who the hell knows. I need a source deep within the Kings trainer's office. Anyone reading?

Anyways, here's my best guess at tonight's starting lineups:

THE FLYING NENADS
PG - That Jason Kidd guy.
SG - Vince Carter. Or not.
SF - Dick Jefferson
PF - Not Shareef Abdur-Rahim. Ha ha.
C  - Nenad.

SACRAMENTO
PG - Mike "Justify My Thug" Bibby
SG - Bonzi "Lucifer" Wells
SF - Peja "Change Clothes" Stojakovic. Or not.
PF - I've got 99 Problems, but Shareef ain't one.
C  - Brad's got some dirt on his pickup, could you wash it off for him?

The line: ESPN says -5. I think I'd take that, if I knew Peja was going to play. But I don't, so I won't. (Have I advocated betting on the Kings once this season? I don't think so.)

Fun bet o' the night: Francisco Garcia minutes played, should Peja get the OK (from his little finger) to start. I say take the under at 12.

Sideshow most likely to be entertaining: Brad Miller, who had better be upset over his Monday performance, abusing the Nets D. Angry Brad is awesome!

Best matchup: Shareef vs. The Jason Collins Experience. Oh yes.

Grant Napear, in brief and in advance: "That's why Geoff Petrie is the best in the league, alright? Right there, Shareef Abdur-Rahim. What did Rod Thorn get? He got Marc Jackson. Geoff Petrie is the best in the league."

Forgotten note from previous Spurs game recaps: Impersonating Grant reminded me of the vomit-inducing moment of Monday's game: Jerry Reynolds and Grant Napear discussing how Robert Horry stole a championship ring from them. JR is one thing - he's an executive or some sort, he probably deserves a ring. But Grant? The play-by-play guy and a local radio host? He would've gotten a ring? That sickens me.

Well, wait: Do I get a ring if the Kings win it all? I am an unofficial blogger after all. If I have to battle Alex Carnavale for it, I will! Dammit.

Enjoy the game. I might get an update in early Thursday morning, though one might not want to hold one's breath. Not that one would hold one's breath or anything.

Let's go Sha-, err Kings! A winning percentage above .400 awaits!